It’s not easy to write the less than perfect parts of life, and while I’d love to pretend I’m 100% on top of everything, that’s sadly not the case!
The truth is I’ve been feeling rather overwhelmed of late. I have well and truly overcommitted myself, and feel an awful lot like a hamster in a wheel, simply running and getting nowhere. I am feeling anxious all the time, nauseous at the thought of my to do list, and trying to find a balance between what I feel like I have to do, and what brings me joy.
When you are at the point I am, can I just say, while I do (truly) appreciate the concern and care, telling me to ‘take a deep breath’ isn’t actually going to help me to solve the problem. I’m not in the middle of a panic attack, I am not (currently) hyperventilating, I am just looking for a way forward, that doesn’t end up with me having a breakdown.
Before you say it, yes I know this is my own fault- I am the one that has put my hand up for things, or just not said ‘no’, but the things I’ve volunteered for are the things that I enjoy doing, it’s the jobs that I haven’t really had a say in that are causing this untold amounts of stress and frazzle-ment (and that’s totally a word!).
Luckily I’m a list writer, I love to schedule and plan, and have conquered the seemingly endless task of weeding out the important, from the unessential- which is why my unfolded washing is in a massive pile in our games room. Having said that, I would love some ideas on what to do, how to get through this tough patch, because feeling like I’m going to burst into tears is really not a pleasant feeling at the moment.
Though please, don’t worry, I know that this too will pass, I know this isn’t the end of the world, and I’m not about to start tearing my hair out and need an intervention. I figure there are likely other people out there feeling the same as I do right now, and so, in the interests of being totally raw and honest I thought I’d share a part of my life I’d really rather keep hidden away. I think we all know I am not infallible, but maybe someone else will feel a little less alone in their journey of life.
So hit me with your advice, your stories or your coping mechanisms, I’d love to hear what works for you, but please, don’t tell me to “just take a deep breath”!